Episode 42

bonus
Published on:

19th Nov 2025

Disaster Diaries: Family Fallout & A Fractured Country

Hey fellow high functioners — today’s diary is coming in hot from the messy middle of family and country stuff.

I talk through the ongoing tech gremlins (looking at you, Mercury retrograde 👀), a beautiful interview with author and nonprofit founder Gail Showalter, and how her work with Single Moms Empowered got me dreaming about what real support for single dads could look like too.

From there, things get more tender: I share how alienated I’ve felt in my own family, what it’s been like to be the primary caregiver for my mom, and how a hard but honest conversation with my aunt finally confirmed what I suspected — sometimes people stay away because what you’re going through is just too heavy for them to face. It doesn’t make it less painful, but it does make it make more sense.

I also dig into mental health and therapy access, the emotional cost of holding space for other people’s stories (hi, podcasters and therapists), and the looming shift from excellent insurance to… let’s call it “bare minimum adjacent.” From there, I wade into bigger-picture stuff: immigration, ethnicity, how brown folks are treated at the post office, and a recent shooting of a cleaning worker here in Indiana that I believe never should’ve happened. It’s a raw, political-leaning reflection — not a debate, not a sermon — just me trying to make sense of a country that feels like a high-functioning disaster.

If you’ve ever felt invisible in your own family, exhausted by caregiving, or heartbroken over how people are treated in this country, this one might make you feel a little less alone. 💛

This diary reflects my personal experience and opinions. It’s not therapy, legal, or medical advice — just one woman processing out loud in real time.

Key Takeaways

  • Family stuff hits the deepest. Feeling excluded by relatives — especially during a heavy caregiving season — can trigger old wounds and create new ones. Naming it out loud can ease the pressure a bit.
  • Caregiving while job-seeking is a brutal combo. Balancing your mom’s needs, unpredictable schedules, and financial stress makes the job hunt feel almost impossible — and you’re navigating it anyway.
  • Therapy access is a privilege, not a guarantee. The shift from excellent insurance to bare-minimum coverage is real, and finding consistent support is harder than it should be.
  • Holding space takes energy. Interviewing guests and sharing your own stories aren’t “just conversations” — they drain and refuel in different ways, and recovering between sessions matters.
  • Our country is struggling. Immigration fear, racism, gun violence, and political extremes show up in everyday places — from a post office line to a tragic local shooting. Ignoring it doesn’t make it go away.
  • Connection still matters. Even when family support is complicated, conversations (like the one with your aunt) can bring clarity, compassion, and a little more emotional breathing room.

⚠️ Content Note:

In this entry, I talk about family estrangement, feeling excluded, caregiving for my mom, mental health and limited access to therapy, U.S. politics, immigration and racism, guns, and a recent shooting death in Indiana. There are no graphic details, but the themes include prejudice, violence, and grief in both family and societal contexts.

✨ Connect with The High-Functioning Disaster:

🏷️ Keywords / Tags

Disaster Diaries, caregiving, aging parent, family estrangement, mental health, therapy access, Mercury retrograde, tech issues, Riverside.fm, podcasting, Gail Showalter, Single Moms Empowered, single moms, single dads, nonprofit work, financial stress, health insurance, U.S. healthcare, immigration, racism, profiling, gun violence, Castle Doctrine, Indiana, grief, loneliness, high-functioning disaster, vulnerability, Brené Brown, Braving the Wilderness

👉 Make sure you’re subscribed to The High-Functioning Disaster so you don’t miss this next entry.

📌 Standard Disclaimer

This podcast reflects personal experiences and opinions and is for informational and peer-support purposes only. It is not medical, mental health, legal, or financial advice. Please consult qualified professionals for guidance specific to you.

Next Episode All Episodes Previous Episode

Listen for free

Show artwork for The High-Functioning Disaster

About the Podcast

The High-Functioning Disaster
High-functioning on the outside. Hot mess on the inside.
You’ve got the color-coded calendar, the competent job persona, the “I’m fine!” mask down to an art—and a mental load heavy enough to throw out your back. Meanwhile, life? That's a hot mess express—total chaos with zero chill and a full tank of emotional baggage. And what makes it even worse? Nearly no one’s talking about it.

Welcome to The High-Functioning Disaster, a podcast for people who are doing their best to hold it together while navigating burnout, grief, trauma, anxiety, caretaking duties, family drama, body image issues, and a to-do list that never quits.

Host Sacha Holder isn’t the disaster (neither are you!)—life is. And this show is about making space for that truth and giving ourselves permission to say it out loud. Every week, Sacha explores what it means to be deeply human in a world that keeps demanding more. Sometimes she’s flying solo, sometimes she brings along guests and friends—but the vibe is always real, raw, unfiltered, and grounded in radical self-acceptance and permission to be human.

We talk boundaries. Body image. Mental health. Emotional labor. The moments where everything feels like too much—and the ones where we catch our breath and keep going.

This isn’t a self-help podcast. It’s a self-permission podcast.
Permission to be exhausted.
To not have it together.
To be honest about what’s hard—without needing to package it as a “lesson.”

Because you don’t need fixing.
You need space to fall apart—and still be seen.
Because some of us are just trying to make it through the day.
And here? That’s more than enough.
New episodes every Monday. Come as you are. Seriously.
Support This Show

About your host

Profile picture for Sacha Holder

Sacha Holder

Sacha Holder is a project manager, podcast host, and bariatric patient who’s not here to pretend it’s all perfect. With over a decade of professional experience and a whole lot of lived experience, she creates podcasts that tell the truth about what it means to live, heal, and grow — through chaos, and curveballs, while keeping it together (mostly).

She’s the voice behind Life in the Bari Lane, a bite-sized bariatric podcast for real people navigating post-op life, and The High-Functioning Disaster, a show about showing up even when everything feels like too much. Through humor, honesty, and zero judgment, Sacha builds community through conversation — because no one should have to figure it out alone.